The Spiritual Exercises can be of great help to anyone who wants to grow in the Lord, but the director has to be aware of the various spiritualities in the Church so that the graces of The Exercises can be nuanced to fit the retreatant. The retreatant may have a monastic, contemplative, or actively apostolic calling.  Identity Vocation  Mission  Name of Grace are the dynamics of the retreat and the retreatant.

          A retreatant lives in a particular context with a particular "flavor."  People's lives can be described as being within a monastic life, a psychological-contemplative life, or an actively apostolic life.  Who are they basically?  What is the warp and woof of their life?  What does it look like?  What mainstream of spirituality is of best service to them?  What describes them best?  Having a spirituality helps them to know who they are and what they can expect of themselves. Perhaps even better, it helps one know what not to expect.

          A good director of the Spiritual Exercises has to know and be sensitive to, all the vocations in the Church, even though the Spiritual Exercises themselves are focused on apostolic spirituality.  People from other traditions who make the Exercises can go home more grounded in their particular identity through the help of the Exercises. 

          People today become too eclectic among spiritualities. They end up with a confused hybrid, or they end up with all the disciplines of all the spiritualities and none of the rewards of any particular spirituality. The director must have skill and knowledge to see an inconsistency. Directors have to be convinced that not all spiritualities are the same, and not all people work out their lives with God in the same way.

          We look to the monastery for holiness because the monastics "look" holy.  They live apart, their garb is distinctive, and people assume they are holy. Does anybody think that people who wear earrings might have a life with God?  We are surprised by the thought.  Even the Church seems to favor the monastic style.  Altar boys and girls and choir members wear monastic gowns. Many priests and bishops, even the documents that come from Rome, assume that the spirituality of the Church is monastic. Some call the Hours, "the Prayer of the Church".  Actually, it is the prayer of about one tenth of one percent of the Church. 

          Let us move on to consider each of the major spiritualities in the church. People have various notions of what spirituality means.  That is why we need to situate what we mean when we speak of  spiritual direction, spirituality,  or giving a retreat of the Spiritual Exercises. Spirituality is not in opposition to materiality.  They are not opposites.  Spirituality is only in opposition to non-spirituality.  We are not trying to get people to be immaterial or angel-like.  We are thoroughly human, and that is what spirituality should help us be.  As Christ was both God and man, any spirituality that has Jesus at its center cannot be purely immaterial.

          There are three mainstreams of spirituality in the Church.  The distinctions among them may not be as clear-cut as other distinctions that could be made.  For instance, all  people in the world are divided into two classes: those who play the trombone and those who do not.  That is a perfectly valid and clear distinction.  It is not a very helpful distinction, but it is a very valid and clear distinction.  Now let me make some distinctions that are not as clear but are more helpful and useful by dividing the spiritualities in the Church into monastic spirituality, psychological-contemplative spirituality, and apostolic spirituality.  I suppose there are as many spiritualities as there are people.  Generally though, they filter out into three mainstreams. All spiritualities are interested in love of God, prayer, forgiveness, the sacramental life, liturgy, union with the Church, growing in charity, in forgiveness, in being forgiven, in concern for God's people. But there is certainly a different emphasis in each spirituality, a different nuance, a different flavor, and a different life-style. It is important for a director to know from what position he or she is directing others and also where the directee might be coming from in his or her own spirituality.

          The first mainstream is monastic spirituality. Monastic spirituality is lived by groups like Carthusians, Trappists, Benedictines, and Cistercians.  Do not think only of people in religious communities, however.  Think of persons living in close quarters and persons living in institutions. Think in terms of retirement homes.  Think of the young housewife with four small children whose busy day is remarkably regular and marked out for her. She is relatively contained in her life.  Those could well be instances of monastic spirituality.  Look to the virgins and widows at the 7:00 o'clock liturgy in the morning.  They come every morning. They say their prayers, and they go home or go to work. Many have a quite regular life, and that is what monastic spirituality entails.

          The lifestyle of the monk is very regular, simple, ascetical, and familial.  A monk may take a vow of stability to remain in the monastery the rest of one's life.  A monk is going to spend 30, 40, 50 years with these same people. Day follows day, follows week, follows month, follows year. A very regular life! 

          In the monastic setting one gets up very early in the morning, maybe 3:00-4:00 a.m.; one chants the Office; one goes in the fields and works. One comes in and has a light breakfast, a little collatio. Then one chants more Office, maybe has the Chapter, and goes out in the fields to work again. If one is not in the fields, perhaps a person makes cheese or bread or jam. It is very simple. Monks sometimes do not eat meat or at least have a restricted diet. The beds might be a little tick, stuffed with straw, so, very ascetical.

          The high value placed on the community is the organizing value in monastic spirituality. The community is where things happen. The asceticism and the prayer of the community make the monk holy.  In effect the monastery says, "Come here and do what we do, and you will become holy." The tone of monastic spirituality is eschatological. It is a flight from the world, fuga mundi.  Eschatological means it is concerned about the four last things: death, judgment, heaven, hell.  Some Carthusians have the practice of keeping an open grave that they file by each day.  They look down there and they say, "Remember, this is where it all leads. Remember death, judgment, heaven, hell."  When they meet each other, they say, "Memento mori," remember death. Imagine a nice sunny day and you pass your friend, saying, "Remember death."  That is a tone!

          Monasticism also has a slogan, "To labor is to pray." Laborare est orare.  This is descriptive of the kind of work that the monastic community does.  The work has certain qualities about it: a certain peace and a certain pace. The monk is not given to long periods of personal prayer. Rather the notion is that his whole life of asceticism and union with God is one of harmony: to be in harmony with the universe and God.  For instance, monks go to bed earlier in the winter and they get up later.  They go to bed later in the summer and they get up earlier because they are in sync, in harmony with light.  In winter it is darker, and they are in harmony with that light and darkness as they are in harmony with the soil and with growing things. To labor is to pray because they are in harmony with God's earth.  A monastery has little involvement with the world. They welcome those who come to them, but there is little attempt to initiate programs and contacts beyond hospitality.

          The organization of monastic spirituality is monarchical and familial.  Life is generally guided by the Abbas.  It is familial because one is going to be living with these people all one's life.  One gets to know their footfall, who is up at night and so on.  It is very familial. Such familiarity is not characteristic of all spiritualities. Monasticism is monarchical in the sense that the decisions to be made are made by the Abbot or the Abbess.  As a matter of fact, there are not that many decisions to be made that involve people other than themselves. Why?  Because the life is so regular. 

          The apostolate is one of testimony, one of witness, and again it is eschatological.  It goes along with the tone of monastic spirituality.  As the ordinary person drives along and sees a monastery, generally a very beautiful building, that person is reminded that those people up in that monastery on the mountain are always about the things of God.  They are always praying and chanting the Office and laboring. They remind me that I should be more about the things of God.  I should pray more, or I should be fairer in my business or family. I remember what goes on up on the mountain, not just what goes on down at the bottom of the mountain. It is saying, "Remember, you people who are down on the bottom of the mountain, busy about many things, that the really important things are up on top of the mountain: death, judgment, heaven, hell.”  We need a reminder like that every once in a while.

          The prayer of monastic spirituality is called the Opus Dei, the work of God, the chanting of the Office. Through reflection on Scripture in community the monk or the nun become steeped in Scripture. Saying the Office on one's own is not the same as, for instance, a seasoned Benedictine Community chanting the Office. There one can see and experience the work of God.

          The second mainstream in spirituality is what we may call  psychological-contemplative spirituality.  It is characteristic of Carmelites, Poor Clares, Passionists, possibly Dominicans. The mendicants, such as the Dominicans and Franciscans, are difficult to place; but I think they belong in this psychological-contemplative spirituality.  Think also of charismatic people, people who participate in charismatic meetings, or the Ashram people, the people who are becoming interested in Eastern spirituality and meditation.  In general psychological-contemplative spirituality is characteristic of people to whom the time of prayer is the hallmark of the spiritual life.  When psychological contemplatives talk about spirituality, they emphasis prayer, or a "time of transcendence," a time of reflection and mulling over the things of God. That is the core of spirituality for the psychological-contemplatives.

          The lifestyle in psychological-contemplative spirituality is also very regular, familial, although not as simple or as ascetical as monastic spirituality.  Very regular and quite familial, they stay together over long years with many of the characteristics of monastic spirituality in their lifestyle. 

          The tonality is again rather eschatological. As St. Augustine says, "We have not here a lasting city." They do not get very involved with the world.  What is important to them is transcendent to the world. Their most transcendent activity is the time of prayer, reflection, and recollection. Persons involved in psychological-contemplative spirituality say in effect, "We do not have here a lasting city. Therefore, let us not get too involved with it, or be overly concerned about it.  Let us not set our heart on it."

          The slogan in psychological-contemplative spirituality is Contemplata aliis tradere, to give away the fruits of contemplation.  It is very evident in Dominicans. For instance, they might give a week’s retreat in a parish and then give a few shorter retreats, perhaps staying outside their convent two to three weeks. They then return to the convent.  It is like using up the power in the battery: giving the retreat, giving away the fruits of contemplation, going back into the monastery to recharge the battery. Back home one absorbs more good things to give away, more fruits of contemplation to give away.

          The involvement with the world for psychological-contemplative people is somewhat more involved than that of the monk.  I remember, several times running seminars on prayer and asking  Carmelites to come. They would come and they would stay around for the seminar, and then they would leave.  They make what I call, "sallies forth." They come out and they do some things within the boundaries of their apostolate and then go back to the monastery.

          The apostolate of the psychological-contemplative people is still somewhat eschatological.  The reason why they are involved with the world is they want to save the world.  Their attitude remains, however, colored by eschatology: death, judgment, heaven, hell. That is an important attitude in their apostolate.

          The prayer of people involved in psychological-contemplative spirituality puts emphasis on Prayer of the Hours, though it is not done with the magnificence of a seasoned Benedictine Community with all the beauty and grace. The psychological-contemplative places more emphasis on private prayer and contemplation. The time of prayer is the value in psychological- contemplative spirituality.  The whole horarium, the daily order and what happens in the priory or the monastery is centered around the time of prayer, or the “time of transcendence.”  Perhaps walking in the cloister garden and pondering the things of the Lord, if not a time of formal prayer, is at least a time of transcendence.

          The religious experience is central.  Psychological-Contemplative people are interested in that altered-state time, the time of prayer, reflection and recollection.  For the charismatics, as well as the Ashram, the religious experience is very important. There is more emphasis on that time of private prayer and contemplation than there is in monastic spirituality.

          Each spirituality imposes burdens and each has is rewards.  One has to watch that one does not get eclectic about spiritualities, taking part of this one and part of that one. A person may be fabricating a spirituality for himself or herself that has all of the burdens and none of the rewards of any recognized spirituality or all of the rewards and none of the burdens.  That will weary the spirit.  That is not good. On the other hand, a person may be fabricating and  trying to live a spirituality for himself or herself  that has all of the payoffs and none of the burdens.  Such a hybrid spirituality lacks discipline, focus, and general goals and objectives. Devout people generally belong to one or the other of the three mainstreams of spiritualities. If one mixes spiritualities, it should be a very knowing and conscious choice.

          Most people in the world are not monks. It is not appropriate that they have a monastic spirituality or a psychological-contemplative spirituality.  By far most people are encouraged and supported by an apostolic spirituality.  Apostolic spirituality is characteristic of lay people, diocesan priests, Jesuits, and many religious congregations.

          Unfortunately, in many seminaries young seminarian are still brought up on monastic spirituality. They have that regular, ascetical life-style together. When they come out into the parish, monastic spirituality is impossible to live because parish life is not regular, simple, and ascetical.  They begin to feel guilty. They grow angry and become totally discouraged.  This experience does real damage to them. Rather, the formation program should have trained them in the apostolic spirituality that they are going to live and that they need in order to be with the people that they serve.

          The lifestyle in apostolic spirituality is very irregular, complex, not as simple, ascetical, or familial as monastic spirituality. For instance, I follow an apostolic spirituality.  I live a complex life: going to departmental meetings, traveling, having friends, being involved in long projects, giving workshops, seeing people for spiritual direction and so on.  It is a very complex life.

          Lifestyle is very important to the notion of a spirituality.  No one is independent of lifestyle, either as an individual or as a member of a group.  It is a part of that Vocation spoken of in Chapter I: Identity Vocation  Mission  Name of Grace.  Considerations of lifestyle, finding a way of living that fosters one’s vocation and spirituality,  is for all people, not just someone belonging to a religious community.

          Tonality in apostolic spirituality is very incarnational, as distinguished from eschatological. What do I mean by incarnational?  By the Incarnation of the Word made Flesh, God mingles Himself with the world. Therefore, we are not trying to flee the world, no fuga mundi, nor are we even primarily trying to save the world.  Because of the Incarnation the world is holy because the Lord mingles Himself with it. Apostolic spirituality places its emphasis on the goodness of the world.  It is a nuance, an appreciation, a thrust of spirit, and one that is very important.

          That can be seen in a practice of the Society of Jesus. When I was going through the course of studies, we would greet each other not with "Remember death," but we would say,  "Praised be Jesus Christ!"  That is a very different tone. 

          For someone in apostolic spirituality the involvement with the world is an extensive and integral part of their life with God.  This can sometimes be dangerous. People involved in apostolic spirituality are circus clowns and stevedores, ballet dancers and schoolteachers, administrators and dedicated parents.  I know one Jesuit, who is a geologist with Exxon Oil and goes around the world finding oil. Others are concerned about the refugees and the hungry. These are people actively involved in a spirituality that embraces the world.  They are not just praying for the world or trying to escape from it.   This is a different thrust, a different appreciation of spirit.  That is the tonality that brings with it a difficulty.  It is difficult to be involved with the world, but not be of the world.  However, the world needs those who will take that risk.

          The slogan, in apostolic spirituality is "a contemplative in action", in actione contemplativus. That does not mean reserving part of my mind to be a contemplative while I am involved in action, but it means the action itself becomes transparent of God.  In classical mysticism union is perceived as the psyche becoming transparent of God.  The classical mystics speak of, "as a coal in the fire," or "a drop of water in the ocean," mixed together. It is that kind of union and, therefore, that kind of knowledge. 

          I like to say there is no trick to becoming a mystic.  There is no gimmick.  All you have to do is love your enemies, and you will be a mystic.  "It will make the blood come out your ears," but you will be a mystic because you will be like God.  You will love your enemies.  You will not be able to tell the difference in your psyche between yourself and God.  You will say, "Is that God or is that me?"  The action of this kind of person is transparent of God.  Meeting God is in the action itself.  Meeting God is the prayer itself. One can find God in the action of the apostolate.  The busyness of the apostolate is no longer a distraction as it might be considered by monastic spirituality or psychological-contemplative spirituality, but the busy work of the apostolate is nourishment for my soul, for my spirit because I am finding God in all things, in the action of it.

          Being involved in apostolic ventures is dangerous, for sure, because one can say, "My work is my prayer" and that is not so.  There is a certain two-ness to love. There is me and God. (I do not mean a “me and Jesus spirituality”). Certainly prayer is necessary in apostolic spirituality, but the emphasis is on quality decision-making consistent with one’s Name of Grace.  Prayer is very important in the Christian spiritual life -- very, very important. However, it is not the most important activity. The life of charity is the most important activity. Loving the neighbor is more important than prayer. 
Here is another story to illustrate what I mean.  When I was a tertian, my tertian-master wanted me to give a retreat to a group of Carthusians in their monastery in London, England.  I said, "No, they are too holy for me to give a retreat to."  I was young at the time. Today I would know I could give a retreat to the Pope because the success in a retreat does not depend on me as director. Who would ever give a retreat if they thought they had to be holier than the one to whom they are giving the retreat?  At the time I would not give the retreat. The Tertian Director said, "Well, at least go visit this old Carthusian in the hospital." 

          The old Carthusian was there. He looked just like an old monk should look, all wizened up face. I walked in and he said, "A Jesuit, huh?"  And I said, "Yes."  He continued, "The strictest Order in the Church."  I was surprised. I said, "Oh? I had not experienced the Jesuits, the Society of Jesus, as being that strict."  And he said, "Oh yes, not the most ascetical, but the strictest."  Then he retorted, "The trouble with you guys is, you only half live it.  If a man is a Carthusian, he either lives it or gets out. You guys are half-hearted heroes."  And I thought, "Well, there is something to what that man is saying.  To be in the world and involved in the world and not to be of the world."  It is easier to go up on top of the mountain and be there and be unstuck from the world than to be in the world and not of it.  That is tough, but that is the job of apostolic spirituality.  That is why lay people understand that spirituality is demanding. They are much in the world. They are pressured in their business. They are pressured at home. There are people who are being unfair and profiting from it. The temptation to be unfair oneself  also is very great. 

          The organization of apostolic spirituality is discerning professional; not monarchical-familial or familial-monarchical, but discerning professional.  We have a rector of the Jesuit community, for instance, and we have men with doctorates in physics, mathematics, English, languages, and spirituality. You name it.  Now the rector cannot know everything that those men know.  He has to be in discerning-professional dialog with them.  Professional means respecting what they know and how they are 
integrated into the professional community and what they do and yet to be discerning. 

           It is just as true for a doctor, a lawyer, a business person, a social worker. A discerning professional has to pay attention to the complexity of his or her circumstance. That is the organizational structure. We are not talking about democratizing religious life or the organizational structure. It is not the same. We are talking about being discerning-professional in the organizational structure.

          Apostolic spirituality, of course, comes into its own in the apostolate.  It is a very direct, involved apostolate.  It is very incarnational.  This world is important. The emphasis is not on just death, judgment, heaven, hell, the hereafter. It emphasizes that this world is very important. The apostolate is complex: trying to effect justice on the docks, teaching people to pray, producing a play,  administrating a parish, writing a book on physics. Those in apostolic spirituality are decisively building the kingdom of God here on earth.

          Notice the word decisively. The apostolate is done with decision. If I had to say what apostolic spirituality is in 25 words or less, I would say, “Apostolic spirituality is a spirituality of choice at the level of faith.”  What is the quality of one’s decision-making?  This is the all-important question in apostolic spirituality.  The emphasis is not on community, how does one  live community life and the things that circle around community; it is not on the time of prayer or the time of transcendence, but it is concerned with the quality of one’s decision-making. 

          Notice, the emphasis is not on the quantity of the work one does. Doing a great deal of work does not define apostolic spirituality.  The point is, what is the quality of my decision-making?  We can all be concerned about the quality of our decision-making.  That is the purpose of The Spiritual Exercises: to rid oneself of disordered affections and attachments and, after getting rid of the disordered affections and attachments, to make decisions on how I will conduct my life and how I will live with God. cf. [1] One of the confusions with apostolic spirituality is that the person practicing it does not “look” holy. Everyone knows the monk is holy.  He has the cowl or she has a veil.  He or she wears a habit and chants the Office. People think they know what a holy person looks like.  Persons in apostolic spirituality may not "look holy" because they are involved with the world and may have earrings, or an evening gown, or sneakers, or a cowboy hat. It is a real discipline to be in the world and not of it, to put your loving and desire into the quality of your decision-making. Earlier we said, “Discerning is an experiential knowledge of the self in the congruence of the object of choice with one’s fundamental religious orientation.”  How does a decision fit with my name of grace?   In giving a directed retreat, either as Annotation [20] (an enclosed eight-day retreat, a thirty-day retreat) or an Annotation [19] extended over several months, what the director is looking for is a spirituality of choice at the level of faith.  How is this person ridding himself or herself of disordered affections and attachments and making discerned decisions?  How is this person decisively building the kingdom? 

          There is not as much emphasis on community or group prayer in apostolic spirituality in the sense of chanting the Office together. There is far more emphasis on private prayer.  The prayer is focused, private prayer: prayer and reflection that leads to greater self-knowledge and finding God in all things.  Why?  Because one is making decisions that affect one's life and the lives of other people. In monastic spirituality there are less occasions for making decisions. If a person in apostolic spirituality is making decisions that affect others, he or she had better know himself or herself well.  Those decisions had better not flow from one's disordered affections, attachments, or from the thrust of one's unconscious. Therefore, a precise and even scientific self-knowledge is needed.

          There is prayer, indeed, in apostolic spirituality, but it is the prayer that leads to the ability to find God in all things, not just in the community activity, not just in the prayer time, but in all things.  This leads to choices at the level of faith.  This leads to finding God in all things: action, prayer, and desire.